Britney, Britney, Britney

My first thought when I saw this photo was "Nice Poncho." Now, they tell me that sarcasm doesn't always translate from the written word... so perhaps I should rephrase this to "Please, never wear this out of the house again" It is most definitely a world of NO.

My second thought was "Mom hair" - cause in the pic on the left it is total mom hair. And, yes I know she is an actual mom. It is just not Britney Spears hair. I was also a little bit thrilled at the possibility that this shorter do meant that he crappy ass weave days we finally behind her. It was a Festivus Miracle! Praise Jeebus.

But no. The miracle of Festivus has yet to reveal itself. The weave is still beyond words. Now, I may be a little slow about some things. But I will never understand how Britney can leave the house looking like that. Knowing that she will be followed and photographed from every angle. How do you leave, knowing your hair looks like that. I am not even remotely famous and I would never leave my apartment with that ratty, stringy mess. Throw on a touque, grab a cute hat, or - a novel concept for Brit-Brit apparently - run a f*cking comb through your hair.

Note to Papa Spears: I know that the conservatorship is possibly coming to an end. But seriously? Is that a good idea? I know it is just a case of lack of hair brushing..... but it is a slippery slope from simply not brushing out a weave, to shaving your head and attacking photogs with an umbrella. Just saying.

XO

Photo Credit: Bauer Griffin / Splash

Brtiney = Amazing body, Crappy Ass Weave (still)

Britney has been enjoying some downtime with her adorable children Sean Preston and Jayden James by spending time at the Ritz Carlton in Marina del Ray. Taking a month of before her The Circus .......Staring Britney Spears tour resumes in Hamilton, Ontario (that is Canada for those of you who don't know), Brit Brit has been flaunting her body in a swathe of different bikinis.

Pink, Purple, Green. Brit looks amazing in them all. The 27 year old has been working hard on tour and most definitely deserved the last month off.

Her devotion to her kids is great. She seems to love them a great deal and is content to spend the day frolicking in the pool with them. I think that they played a large role in her finally accepting help during her "Unfitney" period. She is a great mother and her kids are super cute.

Sean Preston and Jayden James were also sporting some new buzz-cuts a far cry from the bowl cuts they have had for quite a while. Sadly, while Brit was getting her son's hair cut, she didn't think to get her crappy ass weave taken care of. What is that they say about not being able to take the trailer park out of the girl?

XO

Brit-Brit's Crappy Ass Weave

I know that Brit-Brit still has to ask Papa-Spears for pocket money. But damn, doncha think any cash squeezed out of daddy dearest should be spent in a salon getting a decent f*cking weave. I mean, srsly. Now I am a white girl who knows nothing about weaves, but I know sh*t when I see it. And this looks like s*it. Check out these photos of her shopping today on Robertson in LA.

Didn't she learn anything from the TCA's? Honestly. Aren't there people she pays to tell her that it looks cheap and dirrty? Gah, I would tell her for free. Who leaves the house with their hair looking like this? I just don't get it. I say - shave it off again Brit-Brit. Crazy ass bald Britney is better than this f*ckery. I also love the multiple changes of clothes during the course of only a few hours. And the lack of a bra. What is with these girls in Hollyweird? I guess she can just ask Daddy for a little lift if the girls start to sag.

I have an idea..... Britney should totally hook up with Joaquin Phoenix. He has the crazy ass beard going on right? Maybe the two of them could hook up and "play" at being crazy together. Except I think that Joaquin would be the only one playing.

XO

Brooke Hogan for Candies?

Is it just me or does Brit-Brit look a little like Brooke Hogan in some of these ads for Candies. Srsly. On my first glance at them I totally thought it that Candies had downgraded to a different kind of spokesperson. Anyone else see it? Or is it just me?

Britney for Candies

Brooke Hogan currently on sale for $19.99

Many on the interweb have decreed that Brintney's recent change in hair colour means that the crazy is on it's way back. That and the fact that she has recently been snapped by the paps getting coffee more frequently. Well, if that is a signal of impending emotional breakdowns, I am so totally screwed as I need to colour away the grey (eek!) and enjoy caffinated beverages. People should just settle the f*ck down. Until I see an umbrella in her hand, a shaved head and those crazy Britney eyes, I am gonna give Brit-Brit the benefit of the doubt.

XO