Golden Globes disappoint.

This is a long post. Consider this your warning :)

The first really really big awards show of the season were handed out yesterday - the Golden Globes were handed out last night in Hollyweird. I generally very much enjoy these awards as they are a little more wacky and off the cuff than the Oscars. Last night the whole thing was frankly a little meh. This Award Ceremony is fairly unique as it honours both TV and Movie - and it separates the acting and best movie awards into drama and comedy/musical - which I like. A comedic role/movie typically gets drowned out by amazing dramatic performances.

While host Ricky Gervais did the best with the time he was given, that was the problem. He was barely on stage. Lame chicken sh*t NBC - too scared of the unpredictable Brit. He personally came out and introduced both Colin Farrell and Mel Gibson - and they were hysterical. Love him. He should host everything. And not be shackled by those whiny baby asses at NBC.

For a complete list of winners click here. Basically I am perfectly happy with the TV winners - particularly Dexter finally getting some love. John Lithgow and Michael C Hall were amazing this season and their awards were totally and completely spot on. I am calling bullsh*t on many of the Movie Awards. Really? The Hangover as best comedy? Really? And don't even get me started on Avatar. I thought it was a cool movie. I did like it a lot. But best Dramatic Movie of the year? I don't think so. And James Cameron's ego does not need any more stroking. If he wins an Oscar and starts speaking Na'vi in his acceptance speech..... please no. Anything but that.

After flicking through the photos of the dresses - cause it is really all about the dresses - I think these are my favourites. Zoe Saldana needs to eat about 600 Quarter Pounders with EXTRA cheese and bacon, but she looks very pretty. I have nothing but love for Joshua Jackson and even though he is blatantly cheating on me with Diane Kruger, I have to forgive him. He is so rakish and sexy. I am also crushing on Emily Blunt. So beautiful. I wanted to include a picture of her with her fiance (and another of my boyfriends) - the adorable John Krasinski - but none were full length.

I know that Taylor Lautner is only 18 years old - yes all you perves out there, Tay Tay is FINALLY legal, but even an 18 year old should know better than to wear that fricking shiny ugly suit. I think he may be a robot. Perfect teeth, perfect hair, perfect suit, perfect sound bites. And the consistent over pronunciation of ever word that comes out of his mouth. I have been saying this for months, and am glad that others have finally picked up on his incessant and never ending over pronunciation. I am a fan of good diction. I like to think I speak well - if you ignore the cursing. But he honestly sounds like a fricking robot. Robot Taylor. I wonder if I could order one for a friend? My favourite acceptance speech was definitely RDJ. He is not my boyfriend. He is my one true love - so back the f*ck off. And no discussion of the Golden Globes would be complete without mention of George and his woman. Sigh. George is so totally the man.

A quick mention of some of the couples who came out for the Party. Mimi was joined by her Umbrella carrier - Nick Cannon. That is all to be said about them really. Mickey Rourke brought his daughter... sorry, fiance who is actually 5 years younger than his daughter - heh! This picture doesn't show it, but they were both so leathery brown. A world of no. Their relationship just gives me the "no" feeling. I wanna rescue her and tell her that she does not have to marry him. She has options. Finally, Jennifer Aniston and the Scottish douche. I honesty forgot his name for a second. Gerald Butler. Thats it. But still. Ugh. They have what looks like a crappy movie coming out soon, so of course Jen has to show us her snatch in the press room. Sigh. Did you not love when Ricky Gervais introduced her as Rachel from Friends? Made my night.

Hollywood Superstars Sandra Bullock (hate the dress), Julia Roberts (made everything about her) and Halle Berry (very low key and amazing) were also in attendance. Sandy won for The Blind Side. I like her and found her acceptance speech very sincere and endearing. I do like her. She is a competent actress. But was that the dramatic role of the year? Not for me. Carey Mulligan was fricking amazing in An Education. An astonishing performance. Oh well. Sandy has worked hard. I am looking at this as her Erin Brockovitch year. Just as when Julia Roberts won in 2000 perhaps this role in The Blind Side was not the best performance of the year... but Sandy has worked hard, paid her dues, is well liked in the industry..... it is her time. Speaking of Julia, you do know she was offered both The Proposal and The Blind Side? Turned them both down. Regardless, I love how Julia makes everything about her. Red Carpet interview, the award she gave out, you could even her her guffaw when someone made a joke on stage. Cause Julia does not laugh. She guffaws. Trust. And Halle. Gorgeous, amazing Halle. No words.

I liked Anna Kendrick's dress. There I said it. I liked it and I liked Diana Aragon's. Both are a major improvement from what I have seen them in recently. Especially Diana's peach chantilly lace thing she wore a few days ago. Google it. It will make you throw up in your mouth just a little. I was sad that Anna did not win. Although I agree that Mo'Nique was phenomenal in Precious - a devastating, powerful performance. It is her attitude that I do not like. The way she carries herself. But I think someone has had a few words with her, and she is now playing the game. Her speech seemed sincere and heartfelt and inspiring. But I am sorry, she wants an Oscar. She is gonna do what she has to do to get it Which is not necessarily a bad thing. Lea Michele went all out for her first nomination for Glee. It was a'right. Not bad. Just a'right. But she looked a little like a black feather duster.

More couples. Heidi - one half of Heidi and Seal - normally does so much better than that. I guess the fact that she had a baby recently may explain this unfortunate fashion choice. I think she is up to baby number 5 or so. I will forgive her this once. But I do ask - why was she there? Why do they get invited to everything? It is odd. Courtney Cox and David Arquette were there as Courtney was nominated for her great role in the funny funny Cougartown. She did not win and I am sure that David paid the price for the loss when they got home. I am super happy that Toni Collette won for The United States of Tara. If you have not watched this fantastic show - get the to the DVD store and pick up Season One. It is so fricking good. And then there is Cher and Xtina. Who looks good. Gone are the red lips and to that I say a resounding - Yay! Cher and Christina are making a film together and I suppose someone thought that the notion of Cher being back on the big screen wasn't enough to get people into the theatre. That is definitely enough for me! Love Cher.

A lot of people are upset that Jane Lynch did not win for Glee. Granted, she is ah-mazing as Sue Sylvester - and I am personally counting down the seconds until she sings a Madonna song - but Chloe Sevigny last season on Big Love....Holy mother. She was phe-nom-inal. Seriously. So good. This was a well deserved win for Chloe. Many disliked her dress. I like it. Chloe is known for going for the wacky - and this is leaning a little that way.. But I like it. Few could wear it well. Chloe is one of them. I loved her sister-wives dresses as well. Ginnifer Goodwin in the blue is stunning. Just cause I needed another photo to complete the trio - here is Jennifer Garner. I like her. I like that she lives her life and has adorable kids and has some semblance of a normal life with Ben. This was another a'right for me. Not a complete miss. But not a win. And she is to f*cking thin. Eat woman. Please eat.

Apparently these two are in a fight. When Drew went up on stage for her award, she walked right by Cammie D - who was seated at the grown up's table with Leo, Martin Scorsese, George Lucas (why was he there?) and Scorsese's eyebrows - there was nothing. No indication that she even saw her. I wonder what happened. I know that everyone is talking about how adorable and flustered Drew was......ugh. I am over her cutesy act. She is a smart smart woman and she is in no way as ditzy as she pretends to be. I was also over her dress 2 seconds after I saw it. The sea urchins on her hip and shoulder? What was that? Still better than the green nipple dress from a few years ago. I wonder if she had a breast reduction? Cause, the girls are a lot smaller than they were......

On a final note, proof that it can take one small thing to ruin an entire look. As proof of this, look at the picture on the left. Stars of True Blood and recently engaged real life couple - Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer. Love it. Then - the photo on the right. Those hideous shoes - oy! Anna. Disappointing.

Okay, I could go on and on. but this took hours. And I had to forgoe the second half of the season Premier of 24 as that takes concentration! I may make a few random posts about it, but I think I am done. The Golden Globes were lame. Stupid Hollywood Foreign Press. Giving in to middle America. Ugh. Hopefully the Oscars will not piss me off.

XO

Trifecta of Movie Reviews

In November I mentioned that I would be spending the tail end of 2009 at the movies. Tons of purportedly great flicks coming out in time for Awards Season. Eek! And out of all the movies that are on that list from November, I have seen all that have been released here in Vancity, except for one - Nine. I just ran out of days! 2 others – The Messengers and The Lovely Bones have yet to open here. Not sure if The Messengers will and the buzz about The Lovely Bones is not good, with many saying that Jackson completely f*cked up the book - which worries me. No time to review them all extensively….. so here is the last three in mini-review.

Sherlock Holmes

I am not privy to the background or history of Sherlock Holmes. What I know is this: there is a pipe and a sidekick called Dr. Watson and a villain called Moriarity and solving of the crimes. I concur with most of the reviews of Guy Ritchie’s Sherlock Holmes. This film is pretty much about the bromance between Robert Downey Jr and Jude Law.

The plot was silly and pretty much irrelevant. Something about an evil Lord who practices black magic and is part of some evil society that wants to take over the world….. insert image of nefarious villain twirling his black moustache at any point …….. kinda lame and as I said…. Irrelevant.

It is the banter. The relationship between these two is what makes this film enjoyable. And the marvelous Irish music for each of the fight scenes. I also liked Rachel McAdams in her role. She did a great job as Holmes’ conniving former girlfriend who has a checkered past and questionable motives. Much like the entire plot, she seemed a little irrelevant to the story, which some have noted, but I am a huge fan of McAdams, so I didn’t really mind.

Overall, Sherlock Holmes was fun. Silly fun, with very very cute boys fighting and solving crimes. And, to quote the great Kevin Smith, Homes and Watson and their enduring relationship as heterosexual life partners.

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus.

Heath Ledgers last film. His second collaboration with friend Terry Gilliam. Ledger tragically passed away during filming. 3 of his friends – Johnny Depp, Jude Law & Colin Farrell – stepped in to complete the movie. It is not your typical movie. It is a visual feast for the senses and Ledger was impressive.

So Dr Parnassus (Christopher Plummer) made a deal with the Devil (the perfectly cast Tom Waits) to ensure his immortality – his daughter (model Lily Cole) on her 16th birthday. Along the way they encounter a mysterious stranger (Heath Ledger) who may or may not be able to help Parnassus outwit the Devil. The “Imaginarium” is a world full of wonderful colours, lush landscapes and bizarre visions – all of which are personal to each person who enters through the mirror in Parnassus’ traveling sideshow.

Yes, the story was a little out there. Definitely a case of suspending your belief in what is real and what is not. Which I enjoyed immensely. It was wild and wacky and the inclusion of Depp, Law and Farrell honestly seemed as if that is how the film was supposed to be. Casting Tom Wait’s as the Devil was a piece of inspired casting. He was creepy and smarmy and fantastic.

Filmed in Vancouver, I loved recognizing some of the sites of the city I love so much – the stunning Orpheum Theatre, the spectacular Marine Building and the gorgeous Vancouver Public Library (superlative overload anyone??). I liked this movie a lot. It probably won’t be seen by that many people, but it should be. Go see it! Great film.

The Young Victoria

Oh Michael Buble…. You silly silly boy. Did you see her light up the screen? Have you witnessed the accolades that have been heaped on this performance? Did you see what you completely f*cked up? I know that she is better off with her fiancé – the charming and adorable John Krasinski. I said as much a few days ago on the Twitter that scientists should be working to clone Krasinski, cause right now he is pretty much my ideal man. Funny, cute, and not a cheating douchebag.

The point of this little tirade against the Canadian Crooner Michael Buble is that I saw The Young Victoria starring the luminous Emily Blunt. A dramatization of the turbulent first years of Queen Victoria's rule, and her enduring romance with Prince Albert. I don’t know much - or anything - about Queen Victoria or her life. I am pretty sure that they took considerable artistic licence when they were developing this story for the screen. But no matter.

I liked this film. Blunt was stunning, albeit a little hard to swallow as a 17 year old. She is a great actress and a pleasure to watch on the screen. The costumes and set design were magnificent. A tiny little bit of me wishes I had been born back then. Then I remember the whole right to vote, have an opinion, earn as much as men thing. Ha! The Young Victoria is a good film about a Queen I knew very little about. I am expecting Blunt’s name to be called when they announce the Oscar Nominations soon.

I will get around to seeing Nine. I hope. Believe it or not, I am a little movied out! But the Golden Globes are in a few weeks, so I gotta see what I can now right?

XO

Lilo has a new Man?

I have often likened Lindsay Lohan to former train wreck Robert Downey Junior in that she will one day pull herself out of the gutter and become something more than a joke in Hollyweird. I think she has the potential to be a decent actress and unlike some of her current contemporaries in the tabloids (Paris Hilton, any Kardashian) I think she has actually contributed to the world with her craft as opposed to sapping the life force and IQ points from anyone that they encounter.

Unfortunately, I may need to rethink this position. I Know Who Killed me was on TV last night. And I cannot recall when I have seen such unmitigated crap before. And not only the ludicrous story. The acting was also pretty dismal. Actually it was beyond pretty dismal. At least Lindsay got in some practice on a stripper pole right? Cause the way things are going for her, she may be looking at an alternate career in the next few years.

I follow Lilo on the Twitter. Mainly for the Lulz. Most of her recent tweets have been pretty innocuous. The crack tweets that provide so much fodder for the bloggers have been few and far between in the past couple of weeks. But her random tweets to her ‘friends’ are amusing enough. Jumping into conversations between Samantha Ronson and Mindy Kaling, but never receiving a reply from either. She comes across as just another typical fan…. Someone just like the rest of us who @replies to celebrities, even though they rarely respond. It is honestly a little pathetic. But funny as hell for me, so I say @reply on Lindsay, @reply on!

I am also highly amused by her quiet trips to AA meetings surrounded by the paparazzi. As if she didn’t tip them off herself.The pictures are those above. And I gotta give Lilo props. She doesn’t look at all like a crack whore in these photos. Perfectly staged, fresh faced Lilo! Ready to be hired. Not gonna cause any problems on set at all. What is so interesting is that tons of celebrities are working the program, but I don’t really recall seeing photos of anyone else – except those fresh out of rehab – attending meetings. Lindsay is trying really really hard to convince us that she has buckled down and is working hard on a number of new projects.

Apparently that is what she was doing when she spent the night at How I Met Your Mother star Jason Segel’s house the other night. An overnight business meeting is how it was explained. Sure. They are “co-workers”. Pfft. We all know exactly what kind of business these two likely got up to. And to that, I say to Jason Segel….. snap the f*ck out of it. You can do better. Much much better. Even Barney wouldn’t go near that. And he would bang pretty much anything with a pulse.

XO

Christmas Conundrum!

Up until 5 years ago, I worked pretty much every Christmas. It was fine with me, I have very few family here and thought it would be good karma to let those who were from here spend time with their family. Whether they wanted to or not! Anyways now that I have a more office-type job, I get to live like a somewhat regular person and not work on Christmas or Boxing Day.

In the past 5 years my Aunt and I have developed a fun Christmas ritual. Christmas Eve we go to Christ Church Cathedral to sing carols (every year it makes me happy to not burst into flames as I walk into a house of G.O.D), we then go back to her house where I spend the night, then next morning we have Eggs Bennie then she drops me at home and does her thing while I normally end up getting taken in as a stray by one of my friends.

This year, I must confess that I am a little torn. I love spending time with my friends and their families, but this year there are some amazing films being released on Christmas Day. Would it be totally wrong to just spend some quality time alone in a darkened theatre on Christmas Day instead? I can’t decide!

There are no less than three films scheduled to open on December 25th that I am peeing my pants to see. I could conceivably see two of them on Christmas day and then see the next on Boxing Day right?

First up is Sherlock Holmes. RDJ, Jude Law, Rachel McAdams. How could I not see this? Guy Ritchie directing. RDJ shirtless. Enough said. I have been completely in love with Robert Downey Junior since I was a teenager. Remember the movie Less than Zero? I know that his character Julian was a drug addicted male whore who overdosed at the end, but I loved him. Loved him enough that I decided that if I were to have a son, they would be named Julian. Then in my first year of University I met a guy called Julian who was the complete and total opposite of RDJ’s tortured Julian. Ruined the name for me. But not the man. Mad mad mad love for Robert Downey Junior. Can’t wait to see this movie.

Second is Rob Marshall’s musical masterpiece Nine. Daniel Day Lewis… Nicole Kidman… Penelope Cruz… Marion Colltiard…Dame Judi Dench… Sophia Loren. How could you not want to see this?? It looks amazing. I don’t even really care what it is about……something to the effect of DDL is a director trying to work on his latest masterpiece. Things are not going well, so he looks back over his life, at the women who have influenced him. It has music. It has Nicole Kidman. It has Daniel Day Lewis. I am sold!

Opening in limited release on Christmas Day is Heath Ledger’s last film The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus. Directed by Terry Gilliam, this movie looks totally fantastical. It played at the Vancouver International Film Festival in September. They actually had to add extra screenings for it. I didn’t go, because I am lame. Johnny Depp, Colin Farrell and Jude Law stepped in after Ledger’s tragic death and are playing the character of Tony in the different “worlds” that he goes to. And the fact that they donated their paychecks to little Matilda melts my cold black heart. I am just hoping that limited release includes Vancouver!

That is three. Can you appreciate the quandary I am in? I know that I should do the social thing. But if you know me in real life, you know that I am not a fan of any organized holidays. Christmas, Easter, Valentines Day, Thanksgiving. Any of them. Don’t care for them. They insist upon themselves (random quote from The Family Guy just popped into my head). Seriously though, they are commercial and frankly lame. Boo hiss. I am a grinch I know.

And it is not just Christmas Day movies I need to consider. There are quite a few other films coming out just in time for Award Season that I am super excited to see……… A quick rundown of how I will be spending my weekends until the New Year (another Holiday I traditionally do not partake in).

Precious: Based on the Novel “Push” by Sapphire opens next weekend. By all accounts, this is a movie that pretty much devastates whoever sees it. It looks amazing and I am curious to see Mariah Carey sans makeup.

Up In The Air with George Clooney, Anna Kendrick and Vera Farmiga. Jason Reitman’s latest film looks amazing. Clooney stars as Ryan Bingham, a corporate downsizing expert whose cherished life on the road is threatened just as he is on the cusp of reaching ten million frequent flyer miles and after he’s met the frequent-traveler woman of his dreams.It is receiving accolades everywhere it screens and I really cannot wait to see this film.

I am intrigued by Tom Ford’s directorial debut: A Single Man starring Colin Firth. Yes, that Tom Ford. It is about an English professor who tries to go about his day after the death of his partner. I am expecting an extremely well styled film – especially since it is set in the 1960’s. And it also has Julianne Moore, so I am happy.

There is also The Private Lives of Pippa Lee written and directed by Rebecca Miller (daughter of Arthur Miller and wife of Daniel Day Lewis), which I am hoping opens in Vancouver. Robin Wright is Pippa Lee who while trying to find her true self confronts both her past and the seeming perfection of her present life. It has a great supporting cast including Alan Arkin, Keanu Reeves, Julianne Moore, Maria Bello, Blake Lively and Monica Bellucci. It looks amazing.

Then there is Brothers with Natalie Portman, Jake Gyllenhaal and Tobey Maguire. Although the trailer pretty much tells you the whole plot of the movie (consider that your spoiler warning), the cast alone is sufficient to sustain my interest. Ii has finally been getting a little press. I am expecting to cry like a baby. It is a remake of 2004 Danish film, which worries me a little. Hopefully it doesn’t get f*cked up like most remakes.

And these are only a few of the flicks I wanna see. There is also The Messengers, Avatar, The Lovely Bones (another Christmas Day release – boo hiss), Invictus, The Young Victoria and probably more I have forgotten. These are also only films being released in 2009. If we move through to 2010…..I would be completely screwed.

So if you don't hear from me until the new year, I will be at the movies......

XO

King of the Con?

I have been a huge Robert Downey Junior fan since, like, forever. I have even gone so far as to declare to anyone who would listen that were my shriveled, rotting womb to miraculously decide to want to bear fruit, a boy would be named Joshua after his character Less Than Zero. And yes, I am completely aware that Joshua was a drug addicted male prostitute who OD'd at the end of the movie. It is either Joshua or Dylan (only 25% due to Dylan McKay from the original 90210).


No real reason for this post - except to point out the amazingness of RDJ. Inspired by my love of this pic of him with Sherlock Holmes co-star - the fantastical Rachel McAdams. Hands down, bet dressed man at Comic Con.



Oh, he also has this other little move coming out next year..... you may have heard of it. Iron Man 2. This is why he is the King of the Con (well except for Joss Whedon).

XO