Saturday, June 27, 2009

Bradley Versus John

As I have no life and am also very poor, my latest thing is to see a double feature but only pay for one. Only possible at certain theatres as often the times & what I want to see don't match up. And it is not like I do it all the time & just for the sake of seeing a movie. Just sometimes. I look at it as my own personal frequent viewer program. I go to so many movies, I deserve a little reward right? Oh and before you mock me you judgey mc-judgersons I also bring in my food and drink. Whatever. I once knew someone who snuck in empty drink/popcorn containers to take advantage of the refill rates - ewwww. That is way worse right?

Moving on.........

Hollyweird's "it guy" of the moment is the gorgeous Bradley Cooper. Can we talk about his hair for a minute? I think he has eclipsed McDreamy on the hair front. Cause he has the whole I am an asshole to women, but you all want to bone me anyways swagger going on as well. Patrick Dempsey is never more than squawking distance from his wife (who I am sure is lovely......) & that tends to lower his place on the do-me meter.

Bradley has quickly risen on the ranks of Hollyweird's leading men - from smallish roles in a number of films such as Wedding Crashers and Failure to Launch, I best knew him as Will Tippin in Alias. I knew he had some A-List potential even then, & his recent "date" with everyone's favourite friend can only serve to cement his status as Hell-Ay's favourite son (for the next month at least).

Anyways, Coop (as he apparently likes to be called) and his hair star in what is shaping up to be this summers blockbuster comedy - The Hangover - a movie centred around three groomsmen who lose their about-to-be-wed buddy during their drunken misadventures, then must retrace their steps in order to find him.

This is a very funny movie. Lots of laughs and solid performances from the whole cast. Mike Tyson's cameo is killer - although I still have no respect for this accused rapist and wife beater. Heather Graham didn't annoy me as much as I expected, but I hope she doesn't come back for the sequel (of course there will be a sequel - it is already in the works). Ed Helms, from The Daily Show and The Office was awesome and I loved Zach Galifianakis as the eternal screw-up Alan. Don't really know that much about Zach - IMDB tells me he has been in the biz for 10 years and his biggest role to date seems to be a role in the Eliza Dushku series Tru Calling. Hmph.

Recently, he has been doing some great pieces for "Funny or Die" entitled Between Two Ferns With Zach Galifianakis where he "interviews" celebrities - attached is his awkward interview with the fabulous Natalie Portman

The second half of my double features was Away We Go - Sam Mendes follow up to one of my favourite films of last year - Revolutionary Road. This quirky offbeat film stars John Krasinski from The Office & Maya Rudolph from Saturday Night Live as Burt & Verona - a 30 something couple trying to find their place in the world as they prepare for the birth of their first child. I really enjoyed this film. Burt & Verona travel to a number of different cities in the US & Canada (yay Montreal!) to try and discover where "home" is.

This is a couple who are drowning in the fears and insecurities surrounding their lives and impending parenthood and the friends and family they encounter along the way help them to overcome these fears. The supporting cast of Allison Janney, Maggie Gyllenhall, Catherine O'Hara & Jeff Daniels are all great, but I was blown away by Melanie Lynsky as "Munch". She is one half of a couple Burt & Verona went to college with who now live in Montreal and have a such a diverse brood of adopted children that The Brange would be jealous. Her happy and joyful demeanour and excitement over her friends pregnancy masks the devastation of a recent miscarriage and ongoing fertilisation challenges. For only 5-10 minutes of screen time, this was an amazingly subtle and nuanced performance and I was in tears.

It was nice to see John Krasinski as someone other that Jim Halpert from The Office and Maya Rudolph showed that she is capable of so much more than SNL skits. The movie does take itself a little too seriously - the lead's names for example - Burt & Verona? Come on. It is as if they are trying sooo hard to let you know how quirky and independent the film is ya know? But that was a minor thing and I got over it pretty quickly.

The music in this film was amazing amazing amazing. I bought the soundtrack on the way home and have yet another new musical love in the name of Alexi Murdoch. There are no words. Yet another Indie-folk, singer-songwriter UK import to add to my list of obsessions. Ch-ch-check him out. You will not be disappointed. You-Tube evidence below. I want him to come to Vancity so I can worship him in person.

The Hair versus the Brain

It sounds a little strange, but these two films were surprisingly similar, although completely different. Both had major themes regarding being lost in your life and what it takes to figure out your place in the world. And the 2 leading men were very different, but at the end both had figured out where they belonged. The question I was left to ponder after seeing these two movies was - The Hair or the Brain? Which would I choose? And I also think this leads to the question Coop or John? Cause you know that they were kind of playing themselves in these movies. Perfect casting to make my brain hurt as I ponder who would top my freebie five?

The hair is super sexy, an asshole who comes back to you in the end, a lot of fun, and the hair..... quiver. But could you have an actual conversation with the hair? Or would you simply get lost in the flowing locks? The hair would be cocky, confident and sarcastic bordering on mean, but witty and smart? I don't know about that? But.....imagine the make up sex after the fighting.... cause you know with him there would be tons of fighting - Where were you? Why are strippers and whores calling and texting you again? Why did the free clinic call again?

The brain is loving, attentive and there for you...... all the time he is there for you. Like a cold sore, he would be there. All the f*cking time. But, the conversations would be witty and sarcastic and smart. You could joke and play and pun to your hearts content - I love a good pun don't you? - and also discuss what is going on in Iran, the state of the Global Economic Crisis, the environment, the world. And he would not just repeat what he heard the Silver Fox or Jon Stewart say - he would have actual opinions he would be able to back up with facts. But would the passion be there?

My brain hurts from thinking about this. I know that I need a titch of an asshole in my man. Someone who is nice & sweet & kind scares me. I am not used to it and the crazy cynical woman in me would automatically look for the underlying sociopath. But the insecurity of being with the Hair. All those 30 something Hollyweird whores sniffing around. Hoping to hitch their star to the latest big thing. Could anyone handle the insecurity of it? Maybe Angie. She would whip him & his hair into submission.

I can't decide on the Hair or the Brain. I would like a mix of both. Or Johnny Depp. Cause he is the perfect perfect combination of Hair and Brain. I have told you that at one point I had my own Johnny Depp right? A long time ago. Just enough of a bastard to keep the passion alive, but smart and sarcastic and now married to someone else, with a few rugrats running around. Oh well. Maybe his wife will get really really really big - like can't leave the house, Richard Simmons intervention needing big? Oh a bitter girl can dream can't she.


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