Saturday, September 12, 2009

Michael Bay versus Megan Fox versus Random Crew from Transformers

So Megan Fox is also at TIFF promoting another movie I am very much looking forward to seeing - the Diablo Cody penned - Jennifer's Body. I follow Diablo on Twitter - she is very very funny. In this movie, Megan plays a high school cheerleader who is literally a maneater. Part of the reason I want to see this is to see if the girl has any acting chops beyond being half naked, running from giant robots. Admittedly a comedy-horror film may not be the best indicator of acting talent, but anything has to be better than Transformers.

Cause, in spite of a lot of the bulls*it that comes out of her mouth, she did get one thing right in my opinion. Transformers and other action movies are not driven by the acting ability of their stars. They are about fast cars, explosions, half naked chicks being saved by the hero, fighting - not about acting. And that is fine. These big blockbuster action movies are escapism pure and simple. you pay your money, get your popcorn and forget about the real world for a few hours. You don't need to think. You just watch the big screen and see things blow up. Ooh Aah.

But Megan's continual badmouthing of director of Michael Bay - she compared him to Hitler in a recent interview - has prompted a strong response from some people claiming to be members of the crew on his films. In a letter posted on Michael Bay's official site, these 3 unidentified crew have slammed Megan. Here is the letter in full (it is rather long, but funny, so rather than summarise, I thought I would let you read the whole thing):

“This is an open letter to all Michael Bay fans. We are three crew members that have worked with Michael for the past ten years. Last week we read the terrible article with inflammatory, truly trashing quotes by the Ms. Fox about Michael Bay. This letter is to set a few things straight.

Yes, Megan has great eyes, a tight stomach we spray with glycerin, and an awful silly Marilyn Monroe tattoo plastered on her arm that we cover up to keep the moms happy.

Michael found this shy, inexperienced girl, plucked her out of total obscurity thus giving her the biggest shot of any young actresses’ life. He told everyone around to just trust him on his choice. He granted her the starring role in Transformers, a franchise that forever changed her life; she became one of the most googled and oogled women on earth. She was famous! She was the next Angelina Jolie, hooray! Wait a minute, two of us worked with Angelina ‘ second thought ‘ she’s no Angelina. You see, Angelina is a professional.

We know this quite intimately because we’ve had the tedious experience of working with the dumb-as-a-rock Megan Fox on both Transformers movies. We’ve spent a total of 12 months on set making these two movies.

We are in different departments; we can’t give our names because sadly doing so in Hollywood could lead to being banished from future Paramount work. One of us touches Megan’s panties, the other has the often s–ty job of pulling Ms. Sour pants out of her trailer, while another is near the Panaflex camera that helps to memorialize the valley girl on film.

Megan has the press fooled. When we read those magazines we wish we worked with that woman. Megan knows how to work her smile for the press. Those writers should try being on set for two movies, sadly she never smiles. The cast, crew and director make Transformers a really fun and energetic set. We’ve traveled around the world together, so we have never understood why Megan was always such ‘ the grump of the set?

When facing the press, Megan is the queen of talking trailer trash and posing like a porn star. And yes we’ve had the unbearable time of watching her try to act on set, and yes, it’s very cringe-able. So maybe, being a porn star in the future might be a good career option. But make-up beware, she has a paragraph tattooed to her backside (probably due her rotten childhood) easily another 45 minutes in the chair!

So when the three of us caught wind of Ms. Fox, pontificating yet again in some publication (like she actually has something interesting to say) blabbing her trash mouth about a director whom we three have grown to really like. She compared working with Michael, to ‘working with Hitler‘. We actually don’t think she knows who Hitler is by the way. But we wondered how she doesn’t realize what a disgusting, fully uneducated comment this was? Well, here let’s get some facts straight.

Say what you want about Michael ‘ yes at times he can be hard, but he’s also fun, and he challenges everyone for a reason ‘ he simply wants people to bring their ‘A’ game. He comes very prepared, knows exactly what he wants, involves the crew and expects everyone to follow through with his or her best, and that includes the actors. He’s one of the hardest working directors out there.

He gets the best from his crews, many of whom have worked with him for 15 years. And yes, he’s loyal, one of the few directors we’ve encountered who lowered his fee by millions to keep Transformers in the United States and California, so he could work with his own crew.

Megan says that Transformers was an unsafe set? Come on Megan, we know it is a bit more strenuous then the playground at the trailer park, but you don’t insult one of the very best stunt and physical effects teams in the business! Not one person got hurt!

And who is the real Megan Fox? She is very different than the academy nominee and winning actors we’ve all worked around. She’s as about ungracious a person as you can ever fathom. She shows little interest in the crew members around her. We work to make her look good in every way, but she’s absolutely never appreciative of anyone’s hard work. Never a thank you. All the crewmembers have stopped saying hi to Ms. Princess because she never says hello back. It gets tiring. Many think she just really hates the process of being an actress.

Megan has been late to the sets many times. She goes through the motions that make her exude this sense of misery. We’ve heard the A.D’s piped over the radio that Megan won’t walk from her trailer until John Turturro walks first! John’s done seventy-five movies and she’s made two!

Never expect Megan to attend any of the 15 or so crew parties like all the other actors have. And then there’s the classless night she blew off The Royal Prince of Jordan who made a special dinner for all the actors. She doesn’t know that one of the grips daughters wanted to visit their daddy’s work to meet Megan, but he wouldn’t let them come because he told them ’she is not nice.’

The press certainly doesn’t know her most famous line. On our first day in Egypt, the Egyptian government wouldn’t let us shoot because of a permit problem as the actors got ready in make up at the Four Seasons Hotel. Michael tried to make the best of it; he wanted to take the cast and crew on a private tour of the famous Giza pyramids. God hold us witness, Megan said, “I can’t believe Michael is f—ing forcing us to go to the f—ing pyramids!” I guess this is the ‘Hitler guy’ she is referring to.

So this is the Megan Fox you don’t get to see. Maybe she will learn, but we figure if she can sling insults, then she can take them too. Megan really is a thankless, classless, graceless, and shall we say unfriendly b—-. It’s sad how fame can twist people, and even sadder that young girls look up to her. If only they knew who they’re really looking up to.

But ‘Fame’ is fleeting. We, being behind the scenes, seen em’ come and go. Hopefully Michael will have Megatron squish her character in the first ten minutes of Transformers 3. We can tell you that will make the crew happy! -Loyal Transformers Crew”

Ha ha ha. I totally love this. This is almost as good as the whole Rachelle Lefevre v's Summit story from last month. And what is up with this sh*t happening so often. The last one I recall is the letter to Lindsay from the producers of Georgia Rule. That too was awesome.

This letter doesn't really tell me anything new though. So Megan is trailer trash. We knew that. And I really don't think there are that many young girls that look-up to her? We also know that she curses like a sailor and I am not at all surprised that she is a bratty princess. get that these guys are loyal to Michael Bay, But seriously? Do they really think he needs defending from mean and nasty Megan Fox? Do they not realise that they are just prolonging this discussion by writing this letter.

Michael Bay does. Hitler himself has pulled the letter from his site and posted a response:

"I don’t condone the crew letter to Megan. And I don’t condone Megan’s outlandish quotes. But her crazy quips are part of her crazy charm. The fact of the matter I still love working with her, and I know we still get along. I even expect more crazy quotes from her on Transformers 3.

Ha! The fact that Michael Bay - the man who included Megan Fox washing his Ferrari as part of her audition process for Transformers - seems like the mature one in this whole situation makes me laugh.
Megan Fox is kinda trashy. She doesn't censure herself. She may not be "book-smart", but she is most definitely not dumb. She knows exactly what she is doing when she poses like a porn star on every red carpet, sticks her thumb in her mouth and calls Michael Bay Hitler. I find her super entertaining. A little annoying at times, but entertaining none the less. And I don't think she is going anywhere. not for the next few years at least.
Jennifer's Body opens next weekend. It also stars the gorgeous Amanda Seyfreid and the cutie Adam Brody. Can't wait!

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